Wednesday, June 29, 2005

Questions, Questions, Questions

So after many days thinking about different topics - I have come up with a list of questions(not too long) that I need to ask myself and others to find the opinion of the Lord that has somehow been kept from my understanding. Please feel free to answer these questions.

1. If my theology is wrong - do I believe in a God that is wrong? or If my theology is flawed - then do I believe in a flawed God or potentially a God that cannot save me?

2. If I serve in a certain church - be it Methodist, Baptist, Presb., Bible, non-denom., Anglican - does that mean that I have to adopt their beliefs? or does that mean that I endorse what they believe and agree that it is truth?

3. Does God want me to be deeply concerned with my own theology or his theology? -

4. Should my theology determine where I go to church?

CHANGING GEARS NOW

In our generation/s worship music has become more and more prevalent. It is also taking on an avenue for business.

1. For a church/camp/event - what is the benefit of hiring a band, (that has no connection with that specific group of people) - for leading worship? and if the answer is simply for the hope of a better worship experience - then I am in the wrong profession - so please don't say that

2. If I should be based at a church or have a HOME CHURCH - then how does it make sense for me to travel all the time and play music for a living? - which is what I desire to do.

3. Is their only one avenue for honoring God in music or are there multiple? here are the choices A. play at church and serve in the worship band of your home church and your home church only - B. be in a completely secular band or C. be in a worship band that maybe plays at your home church or maybe not and also plays for anything else they can get their hands on - or finally - D. it doesn't matter -

4. Does it please God to make money for leading worship?

- I would love to hear feedback - Tell your friends

Sunday, June 26, 2005

Difficult weeks mixed with mixed feelings

To say the least, I'm confused, bored, anxious, tired, frustrated and bored. Oh yeah and I'm bored. For those of you who "really" know me or have been with me when there aren't a lot of people around, you can tell right away if something is wrong. So here is the scenario...

I moved here (The Woodlands) about four weeks ago? or maybe five? I am living with Jason Miller's parents (who rock by the way), and playing drums at The United Methodist Church of The Woodlands which everyone around here refers to as "The Methidome". HaHa..(sarcastically)

Like I said before... those of you who "really" know me and know what I believe also will acknowledge that I am not a methodist. So right off the bat there is this barrier of theology which does in fact come out in the sermons - all you have to do is listen carefully and you hear it - a little tid bit there and an interjection here.

After a long practice on Saturday night I realized that I hadn't even thought about why we were rehersing or what our purpose was. It's as if I was preparing a meal for no one to eat. (that's a horrible analogy but you get the picture) I felt so empty and low.

There is such an atmoshpere of Christian celebrity today and I believe it is much more prevalent here then back home and I hate it. It makes me sick. The way I talk about the music with other musicians and what actually goes on when we rehearse or work on new songs makes me feel like I talk about worhsip music like it's a business. I really feel as if God is displeased with it all and I am stuck in the middle. I feel more responsible because I acknowledge that it exists yet it doesn't change within me.

Basically for any of you who are still reading this - I am asking for prayer. I want to know what I am made to do. Most all of you know I desire to play music but not if it will be like this. I want to play music but I just don't think I can play the worship music/ christian celebrity game anymore. Now, I am not trying to knock on Christian worship music or any other bands... I am specifically talking about my own personal experience.

Well I'm sure this has been pretty negative for most of you (all two or three that read this thing), but rest assured I know God is teaching me things and waiting for the right time to reveal his next step in the ultimate walk with him in my life.

Please pray for me and if you get the chance give me a call because I do absolutey nothing all day. I am hoping to change that with a job that starts a week from tomorrow. (Monday)

Sunday, June 19, 2005

Getting Adjusted

Hello all

I haven't gotten to talk to a lot of people from home since I moved. I am hoping to start working in the media department of the church in a week or so. I have played twice (the last two sundays) the first sunday was with matt brouwer his website is www.mattbro.com and then I played for Bruce Clinton this morning. It has been a difficult four weeks for me. The second week I was in town I sprained my ankle and it was pretty awful. I tore a tendon in the top of my foot and had to wear a boot/cast for about two weeks. To make matters worse my insurance was also messed up so I had to fly back to Little Rock to get it taken care of. The whole ordeal was pretty frustrating but it all worked out and is beginning to heal. I hope my friends who read this will pray for me because I need it. I have been really anxious to start something and feel like something is going to happen soon I just haven't figured out what it is. I still am having trouble meeting people. It seems like a meet one more person every week and get to know them enough to feel comfortable calling them. Anyways please pray that I find a band or singer to play with full time. I have also been writing songs (which is something I have been doing but not succesfully). However, most of the musicians I have played them for really liked them and we actually got a band together and worked on one of them and it is turning out pretty well. Dont' be afraid to give me a call - believe me I'm not busy right now. Thanks for everyone who has been praying for me.

-Jay-